Back in the 50's and 60's Art Linkletter hosted a show with a section devoted to chatting with kids aged 5-10. Obviously, I wasn't around to see it live, but I've seen many clips and years later Bill Cosby attempted a show of his own in the late 90's with the same title. I LOVE the silly things kids say. I love how uninhibited they are and how they say exactly what is on their mind. What I also love is how they point so directly to the words on our own hearts. Often times kids say what we feel and what we wish we didn't feel. Kids haven't yet learned the art of tact or humility and in many ways they expose our own lack of humility.
Monday I took my nephews to the zoo. If you are losing interest, please stick with me. This is no doting auntie post believe me. I could post a long list of funny things my nephew, Tatum, has said, but what struck me more was a conversation he had with my dad after I took them home.
Tatum loves cars. He is a typical four year-old boy. He loves to race matchbox cars and crash them. He always asks you which one you want to be. If you answer incorrectly, he'll let you know. You have to pick the winning car. That's the way it works. As Tatum prepares for an upcoming matchbox race he proudly displays the two options before my dad.
"Which one grandpa?"
My dad selects a car at random fully aware of Tatum's game.
"No grandpa. That one loses."
My dad answers, "That's okay."
Tatum is fully bewildered at this point and tries to reason with my dad.
"Don't you want to win?"
My dad replies with a quick and easy, "No."
"But, then you'll lose. You want to lose?"
Tatum is puzzled beyond belief and his poor little head is trying to figure this concept out. His face is all contorted and if he had wrinkles on his brow, I'm sure they would've furrowed. Tatum tries again, "You don't want to be a winna" (he has a toddler accent :) and says this pleading with my dad to change his mind)
My dad responds with a classic line that characterizes the man I'm so blessed to call father. He says, "No. I don't want to win. Because If I lose, that means someone else wins and that makes me happy."
I felt as if the air stood still for a moment. It hung thick all around me as I felt tears rising from my clenched throat. Like a flood I recalled all of the countless times my dad has put me first. He truly lives his life this way. He is happiest when he loses...because others win. I am overwhelmed to have a father that has lost so many times for me so I could win. I wish I could be more like my dad, but I fear that I am more like my nephew Tatum questioning, "Don't you wanna win?" What is life really about? Can I be happy losing? or will I continue to question the sanity of those who willingly choose to lose?
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